I write because through writing, I discover who I am. Everything seems so fleeting now, except for what is written. Every once in a while, I’ll pull out writings (letters, poems, whatever) from three or four decades ago, just to get a sense of how much I have changed over the years, and also see some things that have stayed the same.
When I went to university, the writing stopped. I tried to write, but nothing would come out of me. I remember sitting and staring a blank pieces of paper for hours any time there was an assignment due for class. It was not until I became a follower of Jesus at the age of 41 that words began to pour out of me again. The first devotional piece I wrote was quite short, but it felt like a huge weight had come off of my shoulders. And I began to write devotionals on a regular basis. These devotionals would be simply something I had experienced or a reading I had done in the Bible, and the application or the learning that came out of the experience.
One thing I noticed was that when I began writing about whatever experience or reading I had done, I did not know what the ending was in advance. The writing actually helped me process whatever happened in light of Scripture that I was engaged with at the time.
Another thing that I noticed was that where once my writing was very dark (before my long break from writing), my writing now reflected a transformation, redemption and meaning associated with whatever I had experienced.
I like to think that God stopped me from going down a dark road with my writing and withheld the gift until such time as I could reflect a proper perspective on events. Or until such time that I realized his love for me and all creation and could convey even just a little bit of that love in writing.